3 legitimate fears & how?

Hallo im back!
Trying to love blogging, trying to get back all the passion i left past years.
I'm writing this post while listening to Monsta X's Beautiful, the song i jam to because i love them.
I officially left ARMY fandom. Thats it.
They had too much fans, and i am not into overrated stuffs.
I missed stanning them when they were still unknown, and they turned viral with their dance practices.
It makes me happy till now, they get more fans day by day.
The thing is that new fans keep acting like they were with bts from their rookies day when they actually heard of bts in HYYH eras.
And bts were very busy with pack schedules and i truly miss their bangtan bomb.
But dont worry, i am still supporting them and their music because their music is LIT!
Its just that i am not THAT into them.
Im stanning Monsta X, BTOB, DAY6 and some girl groups and am watching produce101 too!

Well, lets get into the topics.
My legitimate fears & how they became my fears.
My biggest fear would be living in the same place with reptiles especially lizards!
I am absolutely okay with bugs and insects but no, not lizards!
How it became my fears, well there was once i stepped on a lizard in a surau.
I was with my friend, Syifa, and we were talking so actively and i freakin step on a freakin lizard!
It felt awful, you know how slimy lizards skin is.
I can still feel it on my foot right now. ewww.
And then, i cried.
And everytime i see lizards, i'll just scream or stay away from it.

Next, would be, failure.
I am afraid of failure.
Ive taste failure and its bitter.
How it became my fear, well it just be.
Because i always imagine my parents disappointed face it makes me urghh.
And too, my other sibling are doing quite great in everything while me urmm.
Thats why, i study really hard here even in Politeknik, to get good results.
Good results so i can go to better places.
These good results actually meant nothing to them because naw, im not a university product yet.
So, i will try my best to get to better university, get a good job, earn money and tadaaa.

Last one would be, my imperfections.
I dont call it insecurities, i call it imperfections.
I always thought, what if i have no one to marry me.
I am so full with imperfections.
I mean, i dont have a pretty face, thats okay but im bad with social skills too.
I barely talk to strangers.
I even barely talk to half of my classmates.

I think thats all my biggest fear right not.
p/s: one more fear is when i have to ask money from abah. kekeke.
THATS WHY I NEED TO EARN MONEY REAL FAST!